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Should I Text Him? Navigating the Digital Dance of Modern Dating

5 mins Read
Dating tips
Feminine energy
Online dating tips

Welcome to the world of modern dating (especially Online Dating), where the simple question, "Should I text him?" holds a universe of uncertainty and anticipation. If you're seeking meaningful connections, know that you're not alone in grappling with the complexities of communication. In this article, I'm diving into the art of texting, empowering you with insights to navigate this digital realm confidently.

Embracing the Dance of Communication

In the vibrant tapestry of modern dating, texting is the thread that weaves initial connections. It's where interest starts to bloom, and relationships begin to take shape. Yet, it's also a world of potential missteps. So, when you’re considering sending that text, remember it's more than just words on a screen. It's about balancing showing your interest and staying true to yourself. 

You may ask yourself, “Is it ok to text a guy first?”

If this is in the context of online dating, some dating apps, such as Bumble, have been programmed for the woman to send the first text. In other apps, it could be optional. This is a very personal matter. However, I believe giving the other person 24 hours to reach out is a good idea in case they are busy or at work. And if he doesn’t, and you feel you really like his profile, not texting him may be a lost opportunity. So go ahead and spare yourself all the “what ifs…”.

You may also think, “Should I stop texting if I always text first?”. My answer is a big YES. Interest should be mutually shared and expressed.

Scenarios may be very different, and each person is unique. If you need advice on online dating and romantic relationships, don’t hesitate to get in touch. I have many many years of online dating experience pre, during and post-pandemic!

The Waiting Game: Listen to Your Heart

Ah, the age-old waiting game. You've had a great conversation, exchanged numbers, and now the big question lingers: when's the right time to press send? But, you know what? There is no universal formula for this. Instead of adhering to rigid rules, focus on what feels right for you. If you're itching to reach out, go ahead and do it. Authenticity and genuineness will always shine through.

Navigating Mindful Conversations

As you journey through these conversations, consider the power of mindful communication. Texts can sometimes be misread, leading to unnecessary confusion and interpretation. In general, opt for messages that reflect your personality and intentions clearly. Ask about their day or share your thoughts on shared interests. These thoughtful texts can initiate conversations that feel both genuine and engaging.

If you're feeling upset or reactive, give yourself time to cool down and move the conversation to a phone call rather than using text.

Remember! Everyone is unique. We have different backgrounds and cultures, and what you understand from a statement can differ greatly from mine.

Listening to the Unspoken

Remember, it's not just about what's said; it's also about what's unsaid. Is the other side responding with enthusiasm and sharing bits of their life? Are the conversations flowing effortlessly? Listen to these echoes of mutual interest or potential hesitation. Trust your instincts—they're remarkably good at deciphering whether this connection holds promise. However, be mindful not to mistake coming from a place of fear and anxiety with instincts. This topic is a whole universe by itself, requiring significant introspection and being in touch with your feelings.

Embracing the Silences

There might be moments of silence in the ebb and flow of communication. Life happens, after all. A short pause doesn't mean disinterest if the conversations have been meaningful and enjoyable. A short pause could mean a different time for each of us. For the more anxious attachment type, a couple of hours may be a long time; for a secure attachment type, even 24 hours may not be considered long. Regardless, if you have asked a question and need a response, follow up after a few hours. Otherwise, it would be more in line with feminine energy to allow the masculine to seek your attention rather than vice versa. Use this time to nurture your passions and interests, and remember that the connection will still be there when the conversation resumes. 

Whenever in doubt, use this simple self-check; Stop, Breath, then ASK yourself,  “Am I coming from a place of Love & Abundance, or am I coming from a place of Fear & Lack?” My rule of thumb is, do not text back when you are emotional.

Authenticity and Courage

As connections deepen, vulnerability and honesty become your best allies. Consider having an open conversation if you need more clarification about the direction. Be brave enough to express your feelings and your desire for clarity. These heart-to-heart discussions showcase your emotional intelligence and pave the way for mature communication within a potential relationship. Generally, I advise having these conversations over a call or in person, not in the text, so the tone of voice and body language can also convey meaning.

Conclusion: Navigating with Heart and Mindfulness

"Should I text him?" is more than just a question; it's a journey through emotions, aspirations, and the intricacies of forming connections. In the realm of modern dating, remember that your authenticity is your greatest strength. Confidence comes from being genuine while respecting the unique pace of each journey.

So, let your true self shine through, whether it's a lighthearted "hi" or a thoughtful inquiry. In a world where authentic connections are precious, your willingness to engage is a beautiful step toward discovering the love you're seeking.

I am here to support you if you need help with online dating or dating in general. Book a free discovery call with me to learn how to make this journey fun and full of discovery together.

Rea 💖Dating and Relationship coach for women

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